More Than a Workout

My BUTI Story

Yoga and dance have been part of my life for more than 20 years. As a teenager struggling with depression, a school counselor suggested I try yoga. I went to my first class at 15 and fell in love with the practice. It was a great complement to my rigorous dance training and a way for me to feel grounded.

I haven't always walked a straight line with yoga. I've taken breaks over the years, especially after I was diagnosed with hypermobility (EDS), which meant I needed to focus less on lengthening and more on strengthening. But yoga is always there and I will forever keep coming back to it.

In 2010, I survived a violent crime: attempted murder. The blunt trauma to my head resulted in a traumatic brain injury (TBI), with memory loss, amnesia, and vision issues, along with major trauma to my nervous system. Recovery meant relearning things most people never have to think about, such as speech, coordination, even how to learn. And even though my physical body was recovering, I became totally disconnected from my body. I lived in fight, flight, or freeze mode for a very long time, like a smoke alarm that couldn't find the off switch.

Enter: The DVD!

In early 2013, Buti found me in the form of a DVD. For my Gen Z friends… a DVD is a thin, shiny disc, roughly the size of a tiny silver frisbee, that you had to carefully slide into a machine and hope it didn't scratch.

Anyway, a friend asked me if I'd ever heard of Buti. "Buti, like booty?" I asked, as we all do. "Nope! Well, I don't think so. I saw it on Facebook and ordered it!" she laughed. (To be fair, your booty will absolutely be involved. It just isn't top priority.) I've always been open to trying any kind of movement (I still love learning new modalities) and I was down to try it. So, we pushed all the furniture to the edges of her living room, popped in the DVD, and pressed play.

Sixty minutes later, I was sobbing on the floor in the fetal position.

I can't name the feeling. It was everything at once: relief, excitement, endorphins, and grief, all rushing in because for the first time in three years, I could feel my body. Something woke up that had been tucked away in survival mode for so long. The best way I can describe it is it felt like my body and brain were finally talking to each other again.

Enter: The Somatic Effect

Here's what I understand now about what happened on that living room floor.

Somatic movement asks you to turn your attention inward, and notice what you feel as you move: the weight of your limbs, the rhythm of your breath, the activation of a muscle, where you are in space. That inward attention is the key to mind-muscle connection. The more you drop down into your body and move to the beat of the music, the more that connection strengthens. Research on somatic movement and our awareness of the sensations inside our bodies has been shown to improve emotion identification and nervous-system regulation.

For me, it felt like my brain and body had been on a long-distance call with terrible reception, and Buti finally found the signal.

And that was it. I was hooked.

Buti has taken me on a nearly 14-year journey. I went from practicing, to teaching, to expanding into other Buti movement styles like Deep, Buti on a Bike, and Bands, and now I'm a Master Trainer!

Enter: The Confidence

Buti is a huge source of confidence for me, and it took me a while to put into words why.

As a yoga and fitness teacher, I never wrote classes. I was never the teacher with a notebook and a two-page play-by-play of the day's class. I teach best when I'm moving on the fly. That wasn't the norm in traditional yoga, dance, and fitness, where classes were written out and followed. No judgment to the teachers who write their classes. It works beautifully for them! But my mind panics at the thought of having to look down at notes, memorize everything (nearly impossible with a TBI), and worry about losing my place.

Buti gave my intuitive teaching style room to grow. But something bigger happened, too. I started to trust my body's ability to move again. I started to feel strong again. I started to feel joy again! Buti became my place to heal as I came home to my body.

If you're waiting to feel confident before you try something new, I get it. For me, it went the other way. The confidence showed up after I started moving.

Enter: Friends Around the World

I've met some of the most incredible people through Buti, and I'm proud to say I have friends all over the globe. A Butisattva can reach out to another Butisattva at any time and will most likely be met with empathy, care, and friendship. No secret handshake required (just a dope beat)!

People come and go from Buti, as they do in every movement practice, and in life. And that's okay. Every person who passes through leaves a meaningful mark. And those of us who stay become the pillars who hold the values and lift up the newcomers.

As a Master Trainer, I strive to provide a sacred space for people to come as they are, tune into their inner world a little deeper, and remember that anything we contribute to our world comes back to us, because we are all connected. I'm your biggest Butisattva cheerleader!

There's My Story. Ready to Try It?

If you want to dip a toe in before you show up in person, you can practice anytime with a free 7-day trial of Buti TV, with on-demand classes you can do in your living room (judgment-free, curtains optional). And when you're ready to feel the room, use the Find a Class map to locate an instructor near you.

With 3 slaps to the mat, and lots of love,

Marissa Nelson